I've spent this year reading a lot. I am fascinated with learning how to understand emotion, our brains, development and growth.
One of the things that strikes me every time I read is that; a person's temperament is present at birth. It's interesting to think back to when you were brand new tiny babies to now, and I can see both of your temperaments very clearly. We all could see them. I found myself saying things like, "well, she's been entertaining us since birth", or "she has always been cautious and curious". As I continue to read these books and articles about the brain and children. I also have come to realize, that the brain changes throughout our whole life based on experiences, education, and relationships. Seeing you in one way like, your temperament, is silly! In 8 years, you have already experienced an array of beauty and adventure that many have not. You go to a great school, and have had wonderful experiences with your teachers, that have helped you to grow. You are gaining friendships and are beginning to understand the beauty and emotion that go into being in a family.
I still can see that same day 1 temperament, 8 years later. But, you as people are growing and changing and feeling new things everyday.
This past year was a year for the books, in my opinion. So, many wonderful adventures were had! So many wonderful people have come into your life and I've seen you both blossom into yourself on your own terms. Not as twins, but as separate people. This year was a hard year for sibling rivalry. In becoming your own people you have found what you need and do not need from people. We have had to really rethink the idea of what is "fair" and instead try to understand we are all on the same team, wanting what's best for everyone on this team. We have worked really hard on repairing when we have hard moments and talking through hard things, and listening when it's hard.
I've watched really exciting accomplishments in gymnastics, golf, and basketball happen this year! I've listened when it was really hard to want to go to rehearsal, and then watched you push through and perform on a stage. This year real grades have come home and we've worked on teaching you that your grades and your accomplishments are yours and while we are always proud, our opinion shouldn't matter as much as your own opinion on how you feel about your work! This isn't always easy when sometimes papers come home with not great grades. We are working on that together though.
The last thing and maybe the most wonderful thing that I have really noticed this year in both of you is your empathy for others. Asking your Uncle to please stop the car in downtown Akron to give the homeless man your left over spaghetti. Noticing a little girl crying at a parade because she didn't get any candy and giving her your candy. These little things that happen without my influence are the most special. This is what matters most to me. I want you to be aggressive and play hard on the basketball court but, I also am the mom that wants you to notice when someone falls, and asks if they are ok.
You are more than your temperament, you will ALWAYS be more than one thing! I am so proud of who you are today and of who you are becoming each day! I love everything about you both!
Happy 8th Birthday to my Ava and Ella!
All my love,
Mom
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